As Spring takes a peek out from under her Sister Winter’s hat and scarf the sun is shining through my living room like a Rainbow after a Storm. I feel such peace and tranquility. I spent some time with my family and friends doing everything and nothing. My baby is thriving around his cousins. I am learning so much from my Tribe. We are enjoying raising our children together. Family is the people that stay when everyone else walks away. Blood makes you related but loyalty makes you family.
I haven’t written in awhile because I have been super busy. Doing a lot of everything and a little of nothing I have been purging my home of the remnants of my former self. I still have my moments but they days of uncertainty and fear of failure are long gone. My sons brighten my life with each smile and touch my heart with each laugh. I love my life and motherhood and I’m so blessed. The journey was all God’s Plan.
You ever just sit back and feel grateful? I mean not after a windfall or blessing. I mean just an ordinary moment where you just KNOW you are exactly where you need to be. Taking care of my sons, creating a new life and working on my health-Spiritual, Mental and Physical became what I was focused on. Kim who was always there for others and their needs, wants and desires is focusing finally on herself. My blood pressure was so high after I had Jermaine it requires medication. I have gotten in so under control that my dosage was lowered. I haven’t had a cigarette since Halloween night 2017. Cold turkey, no patches, medicine or whatever the hell people use to quit. I just want to live to see both my sons have careers and families of their own. My weight is out of control. I was compensating the cigarettes by filling the void with food. My ass is still fat but I am too. I’m being candid with you. I wasn’t eating healthy and I’m doing what I have to do step by step. It’s killing me because I love to eat I’m Ronald’s child but in the long run it will benefit me and increase my life expectancy. I’m trying to look like a Lunchable if not a snack by my sons birthdays. Anything I set my mind to I can accomplish.
I don’t care what anyone else is doing. When I am with my kids playing Monopoly or hanging out with my girlfriends or spending time with the people who I want in my life and who care about me I’m not thinking about anyone else. Sure I have my moments where I’m angry. I didn’t have my children by myself. I could see if I was cooking Meth or orchestrating dog fights but I get invited to events that are not only exciting but also can open up many doors professionally. And I’m an attractive woman and I need time for myself as well. It’s all good believe me. A year ago today I was broken. Literally on the ground. People tried to bury me yet didn’t know I was a seed. It was my demarcation point and I’m thankful because my outlook on life is so much more positive. I don’t have any problems. If you keep yourself busy you dont have time to be MAD. I go to sleep early and wake up early. I hustle and I get it by any means. Above all I am proud of myself.
My late Mother told me years ago about a play Tyler Perry had that she watched. To paraphrase the scene it’s called “ Let it go” TP/Madea is basically saying let it goooooo. People come into your life for a season sometimes. Family members, longtime friends, former companions will subconsciously and deliberately sabotage you. I have helped people in countless ways yet they wouldn’t take me to cash in a winning lottery ticket. Always trying to be better than KIM. Newsflash-try being better than who YOU were yesterday. We don’t even speak yet you are reading this with burning eyes. We ALL drank the same water. We are all given the same twenty four hours each day.
If nothing I say resonates with you just remember: Trust the process. I went from missing New York in Delaware to missing Delaware in New York. My standards are so high. I’m so focused and above all I’m living. I let it go. Im not mad. I don’t have that kind of time. I don’t care if I sell twenty books or two million I just want to complete it. I want to get my degree at least my bachelors because I promised my parents I would. I want to raise Jermaine where he has a chance to experience a good life. I’m a always come out on top because my Mother raised a soldier. I’m not much of a gambler but I’m betting on me-I’m the captain of the A TEAM.
I haven’t written in awhile because I have been super busy. Doing a lot of everything and a little of nothing I have been purging my home of the remnants of my former self. I still have my moments but they days of uncertainty and fear of failure are long gone. My sons brighten my life with each smile and touch my heart with each laugh. I love my life and motherhood and I’m so blessed. The journey was all God’s Plan.
You ever just sit back and feel grateful? I mean not after a windfall or blessing. I mean just an ordinary moment where you just KNOW you are exactly where you need to be. Taking care of my sons, creating a new life and working on my health-Spiritual, Mental and Physical became what I was focused on. Kim who was always there for others and their needs, wants and desires is focusing finally on herself. My blood pressure was so high after I had Jermaine it requires medication. I have gotten in so under control that my dosage was lowered. I haven’t had a cigarette since Halloween night 2017. Cold turkey, no patches, medicine or whatever the hell people use to quit. I just want to live to see both my sons have careers and families of their own. My weight is out of control. I was compensating the cigarettes by filling the void with food. My ass is still fat but I am too. I’m being candid with you. I wasn’t eating healthy and I’m doing what I have to do step by step. It’s killing me because I love to eat I’m Ronald’s child but in the long run it will benefit me and increase my life expectancy. I’m trying to look like a Lunchable if not a snack by my sons birthdays. Anything I set my mind to I can accomplish.
I don’t care what anyone else is doing. When I am with my kids playing Monopoly or hanging out with my girlfriends or spending time with the people who I want in my life and who care about me I’m not thinking about anyone else. Sure I have my moments where I’m angry. I didn’t have my children by myself. I could see if I was cooking Meth or orchestrating dog fights but I get invited to events that are not only exciting but also can open up many doors professionally. And I’m an attractive woman and I need time for myself as well. It’s all good believe me. A year ago today I was broken. Literally on the ground. People tried to bury me yet didn’t know I was a seed. It was my demarcation point and I’m thankful because my outlook on life is so much more positive. I don’t have any problems. If you keep yourself busy you dont have time to be MAD. I go to sleep early and wake up early. I hustle and I get it by any means. Above all I am proud of myself.
My late Mother told me years ago about a play Tyler Perry had that she watched. To paraphrase the scene it’s called “ Let it go” TP/Madea is basically saying let it goooooo. People come into your life for a season sometimes. Family members, longtime friends, former companions will subconsciously and deliberately sabotage you. I have helped people in countless ways yet they wouldn’t take me to cash in a winning lottery ticket. Always trying to be better than KIM. Newsflash-try being better than who YOU were yesterday. We don’t even speak yet you are reading this with burning eyes. We ALL drank the same water. We are all given the same twenty four hours each day.
If nothing I say resonates with you just remember: Trust the process. I went from missing New York in Delaware to missing Delaware in New York. My standards are so high. I’m so focused and above all I’m living. I let it go. Im not mad. I don’t have that kind of time. I don’t care if I sell twenty books or two million I just want to complete it. I want to get my degree at least my bachelors because I promised my parents I would. I want to raise Jermaine where he has a chance to experience a good life. I’m a always come out on top because my Mother raised a soldier. I’m not much of a gambler but I’m betting on me-I’m the captain of the A TEAM.
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