YOU are Enough

 I just want to take a moment and thank everyone near and far for the love shown to my child this holiday  season. From the School to my family, friends and neighbors I am truly thankful.  Christmas  has always been a special time to me. My Mother worked so HARD for MONTHS every YEAR in the Post Office to give us a joyous Christmas . As I age I adore her even more because everyone wasn’t “Mothering” My Father put EVERYTHING together. For EVERYONE. He was the epitome of a Father. He was so GOOD to US. His death wasn’t the true tragedy, me discovering it years later was. He understood though because children often don’t appreciate their parents until they are gone. Not only do I look just like him but I inherited his trait of constantly reinventing myself. I saw my friend walking his kids down these same streets and it touched my heart. Daddy used to take us with him so Mommy could get some REST. He KNEW she was TIRED and he cared! My parents got along SO well because they didn’t CARE. I

My KIDS drive me CRAZY! I love them but they do the MOST! I KNOW Ginny it must of been HELL having a child scared to swim AND fly! Ginny I have a PASSPORT! I’ve been on quite a few PLANES this year. It’s only been two years!  I’m a learn to SWIM Monmy! I am! Martha Beck a columnist and Doctor I have followed for years through Oprah advised that we put something you fear write it down and say you are going to conquer it. Only because you will help others. Or how you will use it for the greater GOOD! THIS will help you achieve it! The link is on my page y’all 👇🏾 I’m watching “Working Moms” by Catherine Reitman (Ivan’s daughter) and it’s a GAMECHANGER! I wanna be up there with these bitches🙋🏾‍♀️🤣😏EXACTLY who I AM! In CANADA with JJ! I’m already writing a book I got my shit going I promised my family! My Aunts ain’t playing with me. Uncle James JUST died! FOR NOTHING! We telling IT! I’ll sell them myself like Ms. Sharon (Sonna’s Mother🕊) and DOE English Department Alumni and Trazier

When David was little I was always RUSHING, busting my ASS and EARS trying to make ends meet. Working a job that I detested to give my child a life many would COVET 😏🤦🏾‍♀️ But there’s GLORY in my STORY because it was written by The Creator and this go round I am present and my Baby is TALKING! NOTHING in the WORLD means more to ME than THAT!  BOTH my children see me being the independent, fearless and STRONG woman that is a replica of my dear, beautiful departed Mother. I’m sorry Ginny if you never knew how much I truly appreciate you on Earth and in Heaven because you were one of kind and raised us the best you could with what you had and I am honored to be your child.  I emphasize the word STRONG because the love of my life saw in me what I couldn’t see in MYSELF! Sometimes in our quest for normalcy and inclusion we forget to embrace the fact that we aren’t born to just fit in we are born to stand out!  My Paternal Grandmother loved each and every one of us uniquely and individual

  One thing about LIFE is that it is just a moment! That’s the unique thing about it the time surely flies! Kids that were born in my twenties are GROWN and as I walk around my neighborhood I see that during this Pandemic an entire new city has emerged.... I used to be so angry and disappointed when people reveal who they truly are. Not any more. It allows me to literally trim the guest list of my life. For almost six years my Mother hasn’t been here to physically guide me or help me navigate through life-she’s the only one I truly miss sitting on my couch yet  I AM doing JUST FINE! 🙏🏾Isolation leads to elevation it truly does.  When you are melancholy(Nana’s word), morose, miserable, dejected, sad and depressed people distance themselves because it can be TOO much for them. That’s ok! Some even use this as a head start to try to get ahead of you or take all of their resources and sometimes other may even assist. them to attain a semblance of superiority over you. It’s a momentary fi

 WCW I really am ENJOYING life! The first rule is don’t sweat the PAST! I am and always will be a perfectionist and a HOARDER🤣🤣🤣🤣I always disappointed myself and my attachment to my possessions was UNHEALTHY! If you throw some shit away you can buy more shit KIM! Clearing the clutter and chaos has sustained me! And I can buy NEW shit 🤣🤣🤣🤣 So many events happened! Big David changed my LIFE! He did! He set me on a trajectory that God instilled in Him! He sees in my sons and I a LIGHT that I NEVER did! He turned it ON!  The ache I have for my Mother was like a veil that I lifted daily(she would of loved that analogy ❤️) happiness was a cloak that I adorned periodically. (Another Gwen gem) I was lost and my hearing, my EARS were truly GONE. Through this tumultuous time I found my VOICE!  Aunt Brina passing away from Covid in NY was also a catalyst. The small shit doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things we call LIFE! The most independent and organized one out of everyone in the

Throughout the Pandemic, the Lockdown and all the turn of events that has crafted a new normal and varies daily I have discovered ways to be creative. To bide my time and maximize my social media and internet usage while juggling everything that life throws at me. PreMadonna has given us an outlet to tap into our hidden and overt cooking talents. During the holiday season her videos gave us LIFE and awakened the Domestic god and goddesses in us all. Her spin on things and her routines has simplified tasks that we use to fear and loath. Her products are affordable and geared to make the time we spend crafting meals for our families enjoyable. You don’t have to break the bank for your food to look and taste like a million bucks.  This Month as we celebrate Women’s History I can not think of anyone who hasn’t brought the hustler out of her gender with her inspirational and candid look at her life. As we all acknowledge there’s no rest for the weary this woman has been on the MOVE even whe

  My grandmother is on my mind because her anniversary is coming up.....I realize how much of an influence she is on me. You know why I have this vast vocabulary? Because Nana used to TALK to me....my family doesn’t really like to talk to about it because I talk so much now🤣🤣🤣 but I was speech delayed as well. I believe it was because of my hearing I always had hearing problems my parents and teachers just masked and hid it because well I was a gifted, black little girl growing up in NYC in a time where every spot was a challenge. It more than likely was co-signed and approved by Nana... My Grandmother was to me in death what she was in life-My Role Model. I KNOW almost everything about her and it makes me admire her more. The respect my Mother had for her was so touching. She always used to say “Miss Betty loves my kids” with pride! Nana gave us everything! ALL of US every time. Christmas, Easter, Halloween, Memorial Day, Fourth of July, we was lit! I am so confident body wise beca

 I did it like 5 times as a Directory Assistance Operator that shift was rough and I was young . My Father worked 630 am-230pm in the Post office he would be at work mad early. Even his funeral started on TIME! 🙏🏾 My mother switched from nights (11-7) to 7am-3pm after 25 years. She worked in the Post Office from the time she was 18 until she retired. She wanted to work in the bank she was brilliant with numbers a trait Courtney inherited. The Post Offive called her first and she committed to it and THEN the bank called her.... She was so MAD at herself for not switching sooner. She wanted to spend every second available to us. I SEE that NOW/. We had the same phone number until I was grown. She always left the best impressions. When she died the man that owns the check cashing place told me that my Mother was one of the most responsible people he ever met...How many times did he cash her checks and she spent almost every dime on bills? No Food Stamps. no Jiggets, no Section 8, no NOT

Nobody: Mommy in the 90’s: Somebody gonna HURT Wendy one day.... Nobody (AGAIN): Mommy: she ain’t lying tho 🧐🤣🤣🤣 I could HEAR back THEN and we listened to the radio EVERY day the shit Wendy would say about people 🥺😱it was HARSH but TRUE like she worked hard in this industry and I really liked this movie....she secured that bag for herself and this MF almost broke her. She portrayed him better than she could if I remember mad shit but like I said I liked this movie I was pleasantly surprised and entertained.  I didn’t watch the documentary yet but I felt THIS on so many levels. He wouldn’t let her talk about herself so she lashed out about others. That was the control. He kept her busy and spent so much time with her that when he was gone she was ok. And he loves her son that’s WHY she STAYED. He got sloppy and he violated to the fullest.  I don’t really KNOW this isn’t any of my fuckin business 🤣🤣🤣 Nobody:  Mommy: Wendy tries TOO hard. She is brave and she should know THIS.  S

  Professionally I feel so empowered, optimistic and Kimmish! I KNOW everything is coming together because God, Daniele and I said so 😏🙏🏾I feel like my Ancestors are so NEAR watching, applauding and loving EVERYTHING I am doing. I’ve learned to invest in myself. And be unapologetic about it as well.  While doing this I have also learned that Nothing is coincidence and The Creator has orchestrated everything for my greater GOOD. There’s a thin line between HURT and ANGER. Sometimes it’s so THIN they TOUCH. I have been ANGRY for too LONG! You know WHY it’s too long? Because every moment I waste being MAD I cannot recover! I miss out on all the JOY in my LIFE!  I am doing FANTASTIC! The ONLY person in this WORLD who ever truly HEARD me gave me a fresh start, another point of view and the resources to change my life! And he didn’t have to! That’s what makes it all the more beautiful. But above ALL he told me that he was HARD on ME because he sees what I don’t! He taught me to LISTEN too

Today is a CHILL day(can I say THAT?) 🤣After class and a few meetings JJ and I are going to have FUN. I do my BEST and GOD does the REST! Twenty years will FLY by and I not only hope to be here to SEE it but to witness the fruits of my LABOR.  I’m living my life day by day. Trusting God and His Wisdom. This period in history will define EVERY generation. I’m learning so much about myself. I’m a giver, a healer but I deplete my own resources by extending myself. So I’ve STOPPED.  One of the WORST days and BEST days of my life (simultaneously) was getting JJ tested for his HEARING. I was ALONE. The head of the hospital was so kind and gracious and understanding. I never told anyone but Big David how I truly FEEL about Jermaine’s Autism diagnosis. The TRUTH, TRUTH. Candid, raw and vulnerable it was so cathartic. The long road and the exposure of my insecurities and shortcomings. It led to my breakthrough and my journey to healing. A man of few words yet he ALWAYS knows just what to say. 

 Love you to the end of time.  Mommy talked to me very candidly the Summer before she passed away. The Pandemic has given me time, space, distance and clarity to organize my life and my thoughts Daddy. Completing a book isn’t a hurdle, it’s a task which I can finish just like everything else in life.  I hope you KNOW how much I appreciate you and everything you tried to teach me. You were a great Father. You did the best you could and I see that now.  Y’all relationship was y’all relationship and I KNOW now WHY! You loved AND cared about us and she could TRUST you! Everything else was immaterial.  Love makes volcanos, cooks chicken in every form possible, raises two spelling bee champions. Love tries over and OVER again for sobriety and LOVE makes sure that even from Heaven your children feel your love. ALL your children love you Daddy they understand and accept that nobody is PERFECT but until your dying breath you SMILED through it ALL.  I am the Gatekeeper through prose and longevit

Thanking God and giving HIM ALL The GLORY for giving me the opportunity to live and thrive throughout the Pandemic and everything associated with it. For allowing me to live abundantly when I could of been destitute and downtrodden. For allowing my abilities to outshine my disability so I can stay focused and use these crucial and formative years to be JJ’s voice.  I want to thank every and anyone who has been there for me in 2020. For the people that made sure Jermaine Jr. had a CHRISTMAS on CHRISTMAS. The amazing teachers and therapists that go above and beyond. Who treat me with dignity and respect.For the dope haircuts that Scid-nice Atkinson does that JJ loves and looks forward too. The discipline and patience that got us HERE. The little things mean the MOST. To my Aunts who lovingly gave my baby and the kids in our family a beautiful holiday your Parents ARE PROUD! For the ones who know that the best thing you can do is just LISTEN to me. No judgements, distain just LISTEN I THA