YOU are Enough

Sometimes I can write ten pages without even skipping a beat. Sometimes the memories become too vivid and I have to take a break. I just want to keep the promise I made to my Late Mother oh so long ago. In the fifth grade after I won the Citywide Writing contest. That I would write and publish a book. The IRONY is Senator Sanders (my political nemesis at one time) was just starting out on the District Council and inspired me so with how eloquently he spoke.  Nana told me years ago to tell "OUR story" because I was going to be famous and someone would write mine. As I age and raise another child in a world full of empty dreams and false ties I KNOW how important speaking LIFE and being there for your children is. I honed my oratory skills in auditoriums, libraries, cafeterias and schoolyards with MANY of my family members in attendance-I STILL can see Nana in the back with her uniform on. Nodding approvingly, giving me the cues to slow down, lift my head. She's the ...

I TALK TOO MUCH. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I am vocal about the things that I am passionate about. I'm truly working on trying to be a better me and to worry less. I am literally tuning out the noise. The values that were instilled in me, the upbringing I had it made me who I am today-flaws and all. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. I do only wish I had of inherited more my Mother's personality. She NEVER lost her cool unless you were trying to play yourself. The stories I heard in the Post Office omg. That's why no matter WHAT I did to try to get fired LOL they wouldn't do it because my Mother was no joke.  I always knew that time we spent together was magical. Now that she's gone I feel it even more so. It also kept me in that Call Center all those years. She worked hard and didn't complain or brag about it either. It was just who she was and how she was raised. I miss her so much. When you blog, communicate publicly in any form it...

It's been a long week. I KNEW when I started writing that the words were going to flow from my mind and create not only a record of my strengths but the process was going to be therapeutic as well. It's NOTHING like doing what you feel good at to make you feel good. I'm not rushing ANYTHING. I am working on being more present in the moment. To enjoy things, times, experiences. I had to let go of what I cannot change in order to concentrate on what I can. I'm too talented, intelligent and beautiful to be bitter. People are just that-PEOPLE. Last weekend I enjoyed myself so much because I was acting like I didn't have a care in the world. I honestly don't-I'm good. Always have been even when I wasn't. That's the Jenkins in me. We are built like that. When you spend time with people who value their time and yours, it's enjoyable. When you make me feel good and valued-I will respond in such. The world is going to try to beat you down. Regardles...

Life has a way of showing you what matters. When I was employed in Telecommunications we used to joke that we were the "readers" who always took over the task in school. I worked in sales from my teenage years. It started selling makeovers and Glamour shots in Green Acres Mall. The phone part was honed being a call taker at the cab stand with Baby Daddy #1. I excelled at new line installations in Queens because I knew all the addresses. The late Kevin Brown taught me so much about our hometown during those times. They REALLY were the GOOD old days. I also worked at an Online Betting Company. That was the greatest job! It was so easy-like selling a blind person a map-the clients loved me but it was inconvenient and I couldn't continue the commute. I HATED working in the Post Office. I tried to be grateful for the experience. I loved working with my Mother and PLAY Aunties. I know that it provided for me throughout my childhood and beyond yet it wasn't an ideal ...

Facebook has a feature that let's you see what you've posted on this day on Social Media. As I am daily reminded of my growth it also unfortunately shows me where I was in my life at a certain point in time as well. Statuses, posts and pictures paint a portrait that I threw in a spiritual fireplace a long time ago. I don't have the answers to all of life's questions. I don't want to try to figure things out ALL the time. I am having so much fun concentrating and focusing on me. I love my children. With everything in me. I am noticing they are happier because I'm GREAT.  My prioritizes are aligned with my goals. I used to OVERTHINK everything. I used to feel sorry for people that don't CARE. About me, themselves or the future. I had an epiphany a few weeks ago. Someone was explaining to me WHY someone else does the things they do to me(unsolicited) which in all honesty mirror the way they treat me as well.... I am a hearing impaired person. I don't ...

Some days are better than others. Circumstances, life experiences and just an ingrained way of living and thinking can hinder our growth. Milestones mark the need for change and often send us on a quest to do things different and experience new adventures. I can only speak for myself but I do well under pressure. I am a procrastinator-I tend to wait for the last, literal minute to complete tasks. I'm always putting things off. It's just me. My father was a very punctual person. His own funeral started on time. He detested that I always was running late. That has been something I have been working on for years and have gotten better at. In becoming a better you you must let go of what is weighing you down. You must accept apologies you're never going to receive. You must forgive people that aren't sorry. You must accept that people are just that PEOPLE and their lot in life is no concern to you. I am close with a few people who are going through so much right n...

                                                              It didn't take long for the world to discover what her family, friends and basically EVERYONE that comes in contact with Cardi B has realized-this WOMAN is a force to be reckoned with. Raised in the Bronx a borough in New York that is a city within a city she has burst on the scene and found fame, fortune and countless fans. Through her television debut on "Love and Hip Hop: New York" she has showed us weekly that not only is she attractive, talented and driven but she also is hilarious, real and down-to-earth. I am a Native New Yorker. I have seen firsthand where your circumstances and decisions can lead you. It's so easy to become a statistic. The fact that she has exceeded expectations and broken records makes me proud. I have been rooting for Cardi B fro...

The current climate in America is heartbreaking. Daily we are fed horrific and racially motivated vitriol. We are experiencing natural disasters fueled by Global Warming which are worsened by the mediocre responses based on geographic location and ethnicity. The Civil Rights Movement and the present day are mirror images and in over sixty years we have made minimal progress. I was raised in the 1980's and educated by the "old" New York City Board of Education. Omitting the few, yet traumatic encounters by educators who attempted to stifle my growth and weaken my spirit- I received a stellar education by teachers who saw my potential and cultivated it. As a late deafened adult who lost the majority of my hearing in my early twenties I used to wonder would I have still been included in gifted and talented programs as a Black little girl with a hearing impairment? Would I STILL have skipped a grade? Would I STILL have gone to operas, Broadway shows, taken tours of airpor...

No matter what life throws at you be confident in the knowledge that He is working EVERYTHING out for your greater good. Even in the chaos, the despair and the unknown give it to Him. In my darkest hour I ALWAYS pray. I talk to God and ask him for his guidance(in my Yolanda Adams voice) Being reared in the church by an Evangelical Godmother my late Aunt Audrey I was reared by the affirmation that prayer changes things. And it does. I needed Him to turn my life around. And He did on His time. I am a work in progress but I am claiming what I need and want in this life. My older cousin Shawana and I were talking recently. She is more like my Aunt in our family and she's extremely successful because's she's always evolving. Knowledge is the key and she's continuously reinventing herself and has ALWAYS been an innovative person. She listens to my dreams and desires without the "be happy for what you have now" spiel that I detest from some. It's...

As I begin my day I try to take the time to count my blessings. I am alive, healthy and have two wonderful and amazing sons who make life worth living. I am also in a great place. It was a long road for me to get where I am today. I am a work in progress but I am so thankful for the journey. I was stagnant for a long time. Content with a life that wasn't apart of God's plan for me any longer. I resisted change. I was comfortable yet I wasn't growing.  I am a very outgoing person. People gravitate to me when I let my light shine. In the immortal words of John Lennon "Some say that I'm a dreamer" All of my life I have had lofty goals, aspirations and desires. I have achieved so many. I'm truly proud of myself. My role as a Mother is my highest achievement. Nothing can or will ever surpass that. I however am on a trajectory to reach my full potential. If not now when? So like with everything I do-I'm going hard. I don't want to wake up one day and...